THE GREAT DELHI VS. MUMBAI DEBATE
Sunday as usual. Two cities. Two personalities. PICTURE THIS: Delhi and Mumbai are locked in a debate. The Moon is the Moderator
Moon: Let’s settle this Delhi vs Mumbai debate once and for all
D-elhi: What’s there to settle? I’m the best
M-umbai: Hahaha! How?
D-elhi: You know what greenery looks like?
M-umbai: You know something called the Indian Ocean?
D: That’s the Arabian Sea! And you call matchboxes houses
M: We don’t need houses; we have Marine Drive
Moon interrupting: But Marine…
M – Shut up, we have Bollywood too
D – Sure, you entertain the country. I run it
M: I have Vada Pav. Only I know how to convert a bun and potato into a cultural institution
D: Agree, no arguments there. My buffaloes love it. As for humans, my street food list is longer than your Sea Link
Moon: Hey Delhi, that’s not right… to…
D: Chup oye. Teri...
D: My pollution is the best in the country.
M: Sure, but have you seen our slums? Largest in Asia
M: And our monsoon flooding. Yours is only knee-deep; mine is up to the waist.
D: Heard of Gurgaon flooding? Bus-deep! That’s also me. My younger brother
M: Ok Ok. My people travel in locals with “3000 closest people” in one compartment. Bonding.
Moon: Where are you guys goi… (Interrupted again)
D: (To Moon now): My potholes vs yours. Shame on you!
Moon: I think we are done here
M: No, we are not. End of the day, I have the country’s two richest Gujaratis
D: And their two Gujarati uncles are with me
OTR Footnotes:
Sorry, debate not settled. Moderator should be replaced next time with the Sun.
Delhi-Mumbai Expressway was built for a reason
Guys, your verdict? Saddi Dilli or Amchi Mumbai?
Last Sip: Not written today
For OTR Archives: suburblive.in/off-the-record
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