Renew and Rebuild Relationships – The Lockdown Learning
Around six years ago, we bought a treadmill with enthusiasm and big dreams floating in our eyes to achieve the so called unachievable fitness goals. The first week went off very well wherein we utilized it to the optimum.
Second week too was not that bad but slowly the charm of running on a treadmill started fading away. It all appeared very monotonous and literally a run-of-the mill experience. Slowly we forgot about the treadmill and it was moved from our room to the balcony.
Suddenly we remembered about this when my son had to knock off few more kilos before he joined his training at the Indian Military Academy at Dehradun. We realized that it had stopped functioning hence he decided to go the conventional way of running and achieved his goals,
That was the end of the saga of our treadmill.
A Relationship Check
The year 2020 unfolded many surprises for us, both pleasant and not so pleasant. Covid-19 has forced us to stay indoors and this is the time when I actually realized the importance of the treadmill lying unattended in the balcony.
I felt bad but this was not about the treadmill, the whole episode gave me a different perspective. There are so many relations that we build over the period of time, making a relationship is easy but keeping them alive and healthy needs effort, love, care, time and concern.
Some relations stay in our life like this unattended treadmill, they exist in our lives but knowingly or unknowingly, we stop paying attention to them. We never realize when those relations start wearing off, shout for attention or demand a stitch in time and then one fine day, they just stop functioning.
We know at the back of our minds that they do exist but perhaps only in the physical form and we stop reaching out to them. This happens with all of us, sometimes we are at the receiving end and sometimes we are the ones who might be doing it.
Had I called the mechanic the day I had found that my treadmill had stopped functioning, perhaps it would have been in a fine condition today and I wouldn’t have missed my usual jogs in the morning.
How long would it have taken to make one phone call? Perhaps I paid no heed, as I was busy with the rattle of my life.
So here is my take, my learning in this lockdown when the entire world is suffering because of this pandemic-
* First of all uncluttered your mind. Let the deep ocean of thoughts inside you be uncharted .
* Think about all those people who you think you should be reaching out to
* Make a list-mental or perhaps on a pad or if you are not technologically challenged then use your phone to make a simple list of people.
* Simply find a suitable time during the day when you feel they’d be relatively free, ick up your phone and give them a call
* Perhaps there will be an initial hitch, some sense of withdrawal , some u awkward silence or a welcoming tone, don’t let yourself get affected by that, just do your Karma and ask about their well-being .
* We all human beings are designed by default to appreciate the feeling of being cared for, we may or may not express it but deep down we all like it.
* Make them feel special , reach out and show them that YOU CARE.
Notes to Self
Care and concern is a warm feeling, show unconditional love, support and forgiveness .
If there are some trust issues – REBUILD TRUST
If you are lacking in giving time – TAKE OUT TIME
If you feel that you are the one who always stretches out the olive branch – PERHAPS YOU ARE THE BIGGER PERSON.
If you have some grudges or knots in your heart-TALK IT OUT.
In this time of lockdown, let the locks of your heart be unlocked.
This is the time to mend what is broken and restore all the pieces together.
Make the most out of this period to work on your emotional ,physical and mental wellbeing.
Lets not ignore those unattended treadmills that rust to death .Don’t wait for the time when you find the ‘need’ to have them in your life, replace it with the ‘want’ to have them around.
So during this lock down,I am going to leave you with a beautiful couplet by Nidafazli.
About the Storyteller: Shailja is a Gurgaon resident and a marketing professional with a passion for writing and photography. Mother of two boys with an adventurous spirit, she has six half marathons in her kitty and she expresses best through her writings – Kathachitram by Shailja